6 Tips for Talking to Children About Divorce

Talking to your children about divorce is never easy, but honesty, empathy, and a united front from both parents can help them feel secure. Tailor the conversation to their age, avoid blame, validate their emotions, and keep communication open. Professional support can also ease the transition and promote emotional well-being.

Tips for Talking to Your Children About Divorce

• Present a United Front: Whenever possible, you should both be present for this conversation. Children need to see that, although the marriage is ending, their parents are still working together to support them. This unified approach builds trust and models mature, respectful behavior.
• Adapt the Message to Their Age:
  • Younger children don’t need a detailed explanation, they need reassurance. Keep it simple: “Mom and Dad won’t be living together anymore, but we both love you very much and that will never change.”
  • Teenagers, on the other hand, may want to know more. They might ask tough questions about where they will live, how holidays will work, or why the divorce is happening. Be honest but keep your answers age-appropriate and avoid blaming the other parent.
• Avoid the Blame Game: Never badmouth your spouse in front of your kids. Your child deserves to have a healthy relationship with both parents.
• Validate their emotions. Kids may feel sad, angry, guilty, or even relieved. Let them know it is okay to have feelings, and that you are there to talk and listen. Reinforce that your divorce is not their fault, this reassurance is especially important for younger children who may internalize blame.
• Be Ready for Questions: They may not react right away. Create an open-door policy so they can ask questions or share feelings over time.
• Consider professional support. A family counselor or child therapist can help children express their emotions in a healthy way and adjust to new routines. Even if your child does not show signs of distress right away, counseling is a proactive step toward long-term emotional wellbeing.

Your children don’t need all the details, but they do need your love, honesty, and consistency. With the right support and thoughtful communication, families can work through divorce in a way that preserves trust, stability, and emotional health.

Zaneta Matthews is an Orlando divorce attorney who helps parents to prioritize their children’s well-being during the separation process. Through her work at Civil Family Resolutions Law Firm, she supports families in creating thoughtful parenting plans and navigating co-parenting with compassion. She is a member of Collaborative Divorce Central Florida and the Florida Academy of Collaborative Professionals. Zaneta Matthews is committed to helping clients make choices that preserve family relationships long after the legal process ends. If you need help with